And Im Like Man Why Cant Life Always Be This Easy

We bust our ass and didn't get that promotion.

We diligently save but can't afford to buy a house.

We put ourselves out there but get anxiety when trying to form meaningful relationships.

This makes you wonder… why can't life be easy?

To answer this question, we can look to the Greek Philosopher Epictetus who said:

"It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.

Epictetus

As a result, today we will be looking at how we can turn down life's difficulty setting by examining the situations we find ourselves in and (more importantly) how to adjust our perceptions of them.

Let's dive in.

Affiliate Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. Please read my disclaimer for more information.

Why Life Is Difficult (And What You Can Do About It)

1. We believe that life "should" be easy (skewing our perception)

Have you ever endlessly scrolled through social media and felt like some people are always just killing it at life? How did that make you feel?

For me personally, I always find that I'm comparing myself to others. And when I constantly see so many people achieving goals that I am struggling with, I'll often feel like an idiot because everyone else makes it look super easy.

In the field of Psychology, this phenomenon is called social comparison theory.

According to Psychology Today, social comparison theory is the idea that "individuals determine their own social and personal worth based on how they stack up against others [in domains such as attractiveness, wealth, intelligence and success]."

And constantly comparing ourselves to others can potentially have major implications on our mental health.

Psychology Today goes on to note that research has shown that those "who regularly compare themselves to others…may experience feelings of deep dissatisfaction, guilt, remorse, and engage in destructive behaviors."

So the next time you find that you are comparing yourself to others, it's important to realize that everyone is at different stages in their lives. We all have different experiences, different backgrounds, and come from different places, etc.

As a result, it's an injustice to ourselves when we believe that everyone's situation is equal and that if we don't stack up against them then we are failures.

Instead of using someone else as our standard for success, as well as how easy things should be, we should instead focus our mental energy on progress towards our individual goals.

When I begin to compare myself to others, I remind myself of the following quote by Ernest Hemingway:

"There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self."

Ernest Hemingway

2. We are emotional beings (and should embrace that)

Life would be a lot easier if we were just happy all the time… right ?

Not necessarily.

While it's easy to associate negative emotions with a hard life, the truth is that there is no such thing as a bad emotion. Every emotion in our emotional catalog (positive + negative) plays a fundamental role in our personal growth and development as humans.

Furthermore, ignoring our negative emotions and only embracing the positive ones (toxic positivity) can actually make us more miserable in the long run.

In a study published in the National Library of Medicine, researchers found that individuals who routinely avoid and ignore negative emotions ended up actually feeling worse.

Having an unrealistic expectation that we should be happy all the time (and avoiding anything uncomfortable) will only lead to disappointment and feeling like life is more difficult.

The reality is that our lives will be full of ups and downs.

And once we embrace that reality, we enable ourselves to experience, reflect & analyze the necessary emotions needed for us to grow as individuals.

3. We are products of our environment

Unfortunately, life's difficulty setting is influenced by forces beyond our control such as:

• Where we were born (affluent vs impoverished area)
• How we grew up (loving vs uninvolved family)
• How others treat us (racism, sexism, homophobia, etc.)

And the hard truth is that the trajectory of our lives, pending a course correction, are already determined before we are born. As an example, our zip code is one of the most accurate predictors of what our lifespan will be.

In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell explores this concept in great detail by examining how our success is heavily tied to luck and being in the right spot at the right time (would recommend checking out).

With that being said, if we are products of our environment, what can we do to make life easier?

The first step is understanding what our goals are.

As an example, let's say that we want to increase our income.

The second step is objectively evaluating our environment.

Do we feel like we can internally negotiate a raise? Or should we consider looking at other jobs? Maybe we can explore 6 figure jobs that don't require a college degree? Maybe we can explore other jobs in our industry that we have experience in?

The third step is actually executing the necessary course correction in order to hit our goals.

We need to proactively ensure that our life's trajectory is aligned to meet our goals. We shouldn't accept the hand that life dealt to us, we should reshuffle the deck instead.

Final Thoughts

Why can't life be easy?

Whenever that question pops into my mind, I pull out a piece of paper and make a list of everything that has gone right in my life. I'll write things such as:

• My daughter was born without any health complications
• I am married to the love of my life
• I have a crazy dog that loves me unconditionally
• I have a loving & supportive family
• I have a home/yard where I can explore my love of horticulture

Life may not be easy all the time. However, by reminding myself of everything that has gone right in my life, I remember that it's all about perspective.

Thank you for reading! 🙂

_

Full Disclosure: Nothing on this site should ever be considered advice, research or an invitation to buy or sell securities, please see my 'Terms & Conditions' page for a full disclaimer.

londonmadeelay87.blogspot.com

Source: https://www.timevaluemillionaire.com/why-cant-life-be-easy/

Bagikan Artikel ini